Behaviors that Harm Your Marriage
Scripture: But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds, 10 and have put on the new man who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him, Colossians 3:8-10 (NKJV)
Observation: Several words deserve further explanation:
Wrath describes passion for a time: opposed to “tender-hearted,” and so it has also been translated as harshness.
blasphemy describes “evil-speaking,” as it is translated in Eph 4:31.
filthy communication – the context favors the translation, “abusive language,” rather than impure conversation. “Foul language” best retains the ambiguity of the original.
Application: The apostle Paul writes that our relationships should be different now that we have been changed from the inside by Jesus. Those things that were commonplace, second nature, should give way to our new nature.
Think of how the words of Paul apply to your relationship with your spouse. Your old self won't be nearly as good of a spouse as your new self. These verses from Colossians challenge us to set aside the poor behaviors that always get in the way of a healthy marriage and put on the character of Christ.
Think of the opposite of these words so that it will help you to practice, or “put on,” the positive traits and not simply fight to not do the negative things. Instead of bitterness , use kindness. Instead of harshness, be tender-hearted. Instead of anger or resentment forgive one another.”
Although it makes it sound as easy as putting on a coat, read the words of today’s passage aloud together with your spouse and listen for that one sinful trait that is the hardest for you to get rid of and the one godly trait that is the hardest to clothe yourself in. Confess the ways you've failed to put on godly character and ask your spouse to forgive you. And then pray together that God will give you the determination to put His character on again and again every day.
A Prayer You May Say: Father, help me today to put on the character of Jesus Christ so that I may be kinder, more gentle, more loving, and more forgiving toward my spouse.
Observation: Several words deserve further explanation:
Wrath describes passion for a time: opposed to “tender-hearted,” and so it has also been translated as harshness.
blasphemy describes “evil-speaking,” as it is translated in Eph 4:31.
filthy communication – the context favors the translation, “abusive language,” rather than impure conversation. “Foul language” best retains the ambiguity of the original.
Application: The apostle Paul writes that our relationships should be different now that we have been changed from the inside by Jesus. Those things that were commonplace, second nature, should give way to our new nature.
Think of how the words of Paul apply to your relationship with your spouse. Your old self won't be nearly as good of a spouse as your new self. These verses from Colossians challenge us to set aside the poor behaviors that always get in the way of a healthy marriage and put on the character of Christ.
Think of the opposite of these words so that it will help you to practice, or “put on,” the positive traits and not simply fight to not do the negative things. Instead of bitterness , use kindness. Instead of harshness, be tender-hearted. Instead of anger or resentment forgive one another.”
Although it makes it sound as easy as putting on a coat, read the words of today’s passage aloud together with your spouse and listen for that one sinful trait that is the hardest for you to get rid of and the one godly trait that is the hardest to clothe yourself in. Confess the ways you've failed to put on godly character and ask your spouse to forgive you. And then pray together that God will give you the determination to put His character on again and again every day.
A Prayer You May Say: Father, help me today to put on the character of Jesus Christ so that I may be kinder, more gentle, more loving, and more forgiving toward my spouse.
Used by permission of Adventist Family Ministries, North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists.
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